Now I've lost all my piss and vinegar from those days two weeks ago when I wasn't sleeping. Need proof? I slept for almost six hours last night, and I'm freakin' tired right now. No fortitude. I drank some syrup at i(pod)hop and that didn't even work. You'd figure pure sugar like that would work some magic, but no. Not quite.

A week until X-Men. I'm dressing up as professor x...does anyone know where I can get a wheelchair? That'd be sweet.

I had this sick compulsion today to buy CDs. It was seriously one of the craziest feelings. I wanted to buy a 3 disc set of Janis Joplin, a Blonde Redhead CD, Rings Around the World by Super Furry Animals, Polyphonic Spree, Serge Gainsbourg....I came thisclose to getting all of them. Here's the sick part: I wasn't even intending to listen to them now. Because I don't really need new records, I'm doing okay with them. I was just going to buy them today with the intention of knowing I could listen to them when the time was 'right.' I seriously felt like a mental patient as I strolled downt he isles of best buy, convincing myself that if I didn't like the Blonde Redhead song Jess put on my tape that I could take it back. But I know I wouldn't. They're probably pretty good.

Help me guys, I'm sick.

I'm looking for a decent, free way to get comments on here since Blogger doesn't host 'em yet. For now, there's a free one on here (click where it says "shout out" and a cute li'l comment window will show up.) This looks like a nice, free one...the only problem is that it's super simple and I'd like it if I could delete or edit comments, which I don't think is possible, but we'll see.

I think that the reason I like the Mountain Goats so much (aside from the obvious "he's really good") is that he reminds me consistently that there is always going to be one more amazing song to hear. One more song where the lyrics will hit me like a ton of bricks and be poignant, thoughtful ones. I love the thought that every time I walk into a record store, I have a chance of picking up something that is as amazing as Grace, In the Aeroplane Over the Sea or any other of a number of records that have come out of nowhere to hold my headphones hostage for long stretches of time. So, with that I leave you with the second half of this song, Elijah.

I know you're waiting.
I know you've been waiting for a long long time.
And i'm coming home.
I'm coming home.

Set the table.
Those three extra places --
One for me,
One for your doubts,
And one for God.

Let the incense burn in every room.
Feel the fullness of time in the empty tomb.
Feel the future kicking in your womb.
I'm coming home.
I'm coming home.

I swear. Those lyrics are incredible. There's more to it than that, but I haven't really figured out the rest. Except there's a verse about idols, and the Bible says Elijah was bent on getting rid of idolatry. What I really love is the way the title is the key to making sense of the lyrics. He does that a lot. For those of you not 'in the know' with Judaism (not that I really am anyway) the real money shot of the song is that during the seder, families often leave an empty seat for the prophet Elijah who is supposed to show up during a part of the meal to announce the coming of the Messiah, which explains the empty places at the table and the empty tomb/future kicking in your womb thing. Woo wee. All that in a two-and-a-half minute pop song. Music that makes you want to learn. I have to love that.

Soft like a pillow.

I think, although it is almost "early" by my standards I'm giong to go to bed. I ate Krispy Kreme donuts last night. Although I think they were technically "Doughnuts." Whateva. Most importantly, they were delicious. Melissa, Andrew (her boyfriend) and I all went out to dinner, then she and I drove to B-Town to get her copy of that book I gave to the Mountain Goat(s). Can't very well write a paper on a book when you give it to one of your musical heroes for a birthday present, can you?

Screw it, man, I don't even have anything that valid to say. Except, I'm meeting that Jesus guy, Kevin Jesmer tomorrow. Did I not tell you about him? Well, you'd think I'd tell you now, but you'd be wrong. I'm going to bed for real, so I can get up and finish my paper on that book. Man, it's a good book. Somebody else read it, please.

As I packed up my books in Bob Hagaman's history class this afternoon, I breathed a sigh of relief that I would only have to do so five more times. In tech editing, I wondered if I could reasonably spend 20 minutes in the bathroom listening to The Pixies without anyone noticing. "Go ahead, just do it" the little devil on my shoulder goaded me, "Nobody will even notice. Leave now, slip back in when there's about 7 minutes left. Genius." Meanwhile, the angel on my other shoulder wasn't telling me to stay in class, he was telling me to lay my head on the desk and just sleep. And that's when the prof told me to wake up. But even he seemed half-hearted. Even he seemed to understand that I don't need to be awake for a damned thing. Except sunrise, which I keep being awake for. Man. Within five minutes of conversation with me today, my friend Susan wrote down the name of some herbal supplements for me to take for sleeping. Is it that obvious? Guess so.

Wilco is playing in dekalb tonight, and I can't go. This post was twice as long as this, but my computer lost the second half just now. It used to end with "I have 21 minutes in which I can sleep before I have to leave for my next class" but now, the time has dwindled down to 18 and somehow that 3 minute difference makes me want to give up. I feel like a big, fat, supersaturated rain cloud hovering over a park completely unnoticed by the people picnicking down below.

Eat your potato salad, assholes. Just don't get on my bad side. Not today.